Stupid people who deserve honorable mention (Part 1).
02/17/05

A friend of ours is sick, and everybody wants to know what they can do to help save her. So instead of you having to ask me the questions, I've composed a list of frequently asked questions that you may have, along with answers:
 

FAQ's about our sick friend:

Q: A friend of mine is sick, how can I help?
A: You can't.

Q: But I really don't want her to die!
A: Neither do I, now shut up.

Q: If I brag about all the aveiros that I plan on "no longer doing" in the forums, will I become more popular and pick up chicks?
A: No.

I think that about sums it all up. But for all the specifics, and for who is "specifically stupid", read on...

I've been reading through the forums lately, something I rarely do, to try to find out the latest information about my friend, who happens to be sick now...

Here are some stupid things that people have said, which in my opinion, deserve honorable mention:

Things YOU can do to help our sick friend here...

RIVLIN: Cut down on a sin you do often. Everyone knows themselves best.
   Re: No, not that one!

Wicked Witch: I'm trying to cut the cursing and I'm also trying to stop being so insulting and rude all the time...
   Re: Hmmm, not a bad idea. IN GENERAL.

sheercoincidence: I did this with a girl in my class who was in remission but the cancer came back this year. I made a Kabala to always wash before I eat bread in her Zechus. I'm going to try to not answer back to my parents now...
   Re: So basically, you prayed your balls off and the person died anyway..... I've seen that happen too much, you know? I think deeds are more important than prayers but that's just me. Like if I was God and I wanted to kill someone, and people started getting down on their knees and begging me not to, I'd do it just to piss them off, but that's just me, and I'm sadistic.

Which brings us to the next one...

Yosef: I'll do a few of those things, She must get better!!!!!

Basadai: anything u do can help
take every jewish class in school and say its for her refuah sheleme i know that helps alot
   Re: God doesn't give a shit if you enroll yourself in Hebrew 101, trust me.

Pretty much, the rest of it was cool. We should try to be better people, of course. And you know, show God that we care and stuff. But taking a Hebrew language class ???? C'mon...

I might be updating this one, so check back, you know, just in case there are other stupid people out there...
Come to think of it, I probably will be updating this one...

In closing, don't take anything I said out of context. I really do sincerely hope that our friend gets better. Thank you.